Surprise Daddy! 
I just heard a story about a friend of mine back in Florida that I haven't talked to in about a year, and it's pretty juicy. He got a letter in the mail and opened it while his girlfriend, whose house he lived at, was standing over his shoulder also reading it. It was from an attorney telling him that he's got a 3-year-old daughter from some random chick he picked up at a bar and fucked one night. And yes, he had that same girlfriend back then too. It didn't take long for her to call the cops to escort him and all his shit out of her house, and now he's living with this other chick he fucked 4 years ago, and raising a daughter. Life sure is full of surprises. And that's why you should always pull out. --Adam Leave A Comment
What a Week 
To make a really long story short, we went down to visit family in Florida and by some very weird circumstance, my foot got infected. Infected in the sense that my foot looked like a massive sausage in sandals. I limped around on it a few days and when I got back to Boston, seen a doctor that morning. It turns out, they think it's cellulitis. I have no idea how or why I could have gotten it, unless some fat from my stomach made it's way down. I'm not sure. But it hurts like hell, and all I can do is sit on the couch with my leg up. Fun. --Jay D. Leave A Comment
Wasteful Wiping 
Why is it that chicks use so much fucking toilet paper? Even if I take a greasy cheeseburger shit or squeeze out the soft serve, and I only have 5 squares, I'll make it work. I wipe, fold, wipe, fold and wipe until I need to reload. But I swear every chick wraps half a god damn roll around her hand, and then dabs 3 drops of piss off her pussy lips. What the fuck is up with that, ladies? --Adam Leave A Comment
How Stupid Can They Be? 
I don't know why, but sometimes I'm still amazed at just how stupid people can be. Like this couple for example, who locked themselves inside their keyless car. They were trapped for 13 hours and tried almost everything to get out, including honking the horn to alert help and trying to break the window with the car jack. The one thing they didn't try, however, was unlocking the door and pulling the handle. Only a genius would think to do that. They were eventually let out by a neighbor, and would have suffocated in another half hour or so. People this dumb are wasting valuable resources and really don't deserve a 2nd chance. --Adam Leave A Comment
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GOTCHA BITCHES

08/31/2014

So if you haven‘t figured it out already, Rockinron is not dead. He‘s actually feeling better than ever after we successfully pranked you fuckers. When he first brought up the idea of me announcing his death, I thought, if done right it could be really funny, but it turned out so much greater than I ever imagined. People were truly bummed out. It was so awesome. Even Jay texted me, "Seriously?", right after he read my blog. For a second I thought about replying, "Yup&q...

Read More....
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