Foreign Relations 
Last night I had the opportunity to explain what the shocker is to a couple of German girls. Two in the pink, one in the stink doesn't translate too well, so a visual demonstration was a required. They acted like it was gross, but you know they love it. They all love to be shocked. --Adam Leave A Comment
Work... 
So, yesterday I pulled two shifts. Seven hours at one post, an hour break and seven hours at another. During my first post, nothing really exciting happened. Other than the cops showing up for some domestic incident between a couple of crack-heads. Yay! Crackheads! However, when I first got to work I noticed a folded piece of paper in the golf-cart with "security" written on it. I paid no mind to it as I figured it was something from the previous night that my friend took care of. It was something from the previous night for sure.... After taking my next post, which happens to be the next building over, I get a call from my friend. He asked about the letter, I told him I saw it and paid no attention to it. He tells me he read it and I should meet him in the parking lot, as it was a disturbing letter. So, I start thinking, did someone make a threat? Nope, well, maybe? This is what the note said: "Interested in after work service? Bi-guy here and you are hot! If so email me blahblahblah@blah.blah Very discreet here." It was a note from his secret admirer. I was in fucking tears! My friend, not so much. I gave him hell all night! Love always, --Henry M. Leave A Comment
Thun, thun, thun? 
What the fuck? Have you guys heard that absolute piece-of-shit of a song called "Don't drop that thun, thun, thun." Worst fucking thing since Lil Wayne. Absolute fucking garbage! Some California hip-hop bullshit done by some fucking Somali and a fat tub-of-shit rapping about giving girls pills and shit. Oh yeah, they can spell too, well at least the word "freak." Music has gone to absolute shit. Metal has become all gay with these hipster looking fags, hip-hop is just fucking retarded and country has sold out. What's your take on this musical menagerie? Music is shit these days! Every little worthless fuck with a computer thinks they're a musician. A musician plays an instrument not a computer. Hatefully yours, --Henry M. Leave A Comment
Cunt Struck 
What's up with guys meeting some chick and then all of the sudden becoming totally pussified? Cunt struck is what my friend's dad calls it. I understand wanting to spend time with your lady and shit, but when you blow off all your friends just cause you're getting some regular pussy for the time being, well, that shit just ain't right. And you know the chick is going to get sick of his ass real soon too. Then he'll come moping to all his friends he hasn't given a shit about since he started getting some trim, whining like a little bitch. He better be buying all the beers when that shit goes down. --Adam Leave A Comment
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GOTCHA BITCHES

08/31/2014

So if you haven‘t figured it out already, Rockinron is not dead. He‘s actually feeling better than ever after we successfully pranked you fuckers. When he first brought up the idea of me announcing his death, I thought, if done right it could be really funny, but it turned out so much greater than I ever imagined. People were truly bummed out. It was so awesome. Even Jay texted me, "Seriously?", right after he read my blog. For a second I thought about replying, "Yup&q...

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