Things To Do In An Elevator

on 03.26.2008

  1. When there‘s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn‘t you.
  2. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
  3. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
  4. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you‘re on.
  5. Hold the doors open and say you‘re waiting for your friend. After awhile, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How‘s your day been?"
  6. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That‘s mine!"
  7. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
  8. Move your desk in to the elevator and whenever someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
  9. Lay down a Twister mat and ask people if they‘d like to play.
  10. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.
  11. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exit with the passengers.
  12. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
  13. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
  14. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It‘s okay. Don‘t panic, they open up again."
  15. Swat at flies that don‘t exist.
  16. Tell people that you can see their aura.
  17. Call out, "Group hug!" then enforce it.
  18. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
  19. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
  20. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
  21. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You‘re one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
  22. Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
  23. Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
  24. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
  25. Grinning, stare at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."
  26. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
  27. Offer name tags to all the other passengers. Wear yours upside down.
  28. When the elevator reaches a floor, pretend you‘re struggling to open the door. And when it opens, by itself, play embarrassed.
  29. Murmur, "Have to pee, have to pee", then say "Oooppps!"
  30. Scream out Geronimo every time the door opens.
  31. When everything is quiet, ask "Who‘s cell phone is that?

Jay D., jay@crazyshit.com
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Comments From the Peanut Gallery
i do some of these things in public it drives my wife nuts
posted on: 03-28-08 @ 6:31 PM

wait till the elevator is full and fart
posted on: 03-29-08 @ 2:21 PM

As soon as the doors clothes begin undressing.
posted on: 08-05-08 @ 8:54 PM

ive done 3's: 6,7,9,13,17,18,29, and 31. and i once brought in a pillow and blanket n just layed there long story short i got kicked out cuz they thought i was a hobo.
posted on: 08-12-08 @ 1:27 AM

sounds fun
posted on: 10-27-08 @ 9:20 PM

I once barfed in a full elevator.
posted on: 05-01-09 @ 11:52 PM

I love when arriving at the first floor, before anyone can get on to ride up, push all the buttons on my way out the elevator. You can hear them all cuss you out as you leave.
posted on: 09-27-09 @ 9:29 AM

^^^^^never seen a door "Clothes" before??
posted on: 09-27-09 @ 9:39 AM