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> LITERATURE > HOMEPAGE RANTS > BAKING GOODIES!

Baking Goodies!

on 08.04.2012

When is the right time to give your significant other their first official dutch-oven? I know it's definitely not while they have a cold or sinus infection. That's just a waste of good ole colon-fumes. How long do you think it takes to get stankin-ass, fartin under the covers, shittin in front of each other comfortable? I mean a lil premature attackulation with the foul ass-odor and you might loose your long-term fuck-buddy. However, a one-night-stand, now that's a different story. I'd dutch-oven that bitch for breakfast! --Henry M.

Henry M., henrym@crazyshit.com
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Comments From the Peanut Gallery
2indastink
+4
I regularly shit the bed when I sleep with my girlfriend/chicken.
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 1:18 PM

wisconsinjed
+7
Good questions Henry! All good questions. For only $9.99 I will send you my proven "Flatulence Stank to Clean Air. How Long Will it Take?" I’ve taken into account diet, wetness, length and even ethnicity and race so you can be sure before lifting those covers! If you order in the next 10 minutes, cause I can’t do this ALL DAY, I will donate 3 cents to help the soon to be unemployed CS employees. They desperately need our help! Who in the hell is goin’ to hire em’?
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 1:42 PM

potrostation
0
Why is she still in your bed a breakfast? You can’t been seen with her in daylight. It’s against the bootee call rules.
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 3:57 PM

rodgtard
-1
The last time i dutch ovened the wife i sharted on her leg. I thought she was going to be pissed. But the dog licked it off her thigh and everything was fine.
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 8:27 PM

bigtalk
-1
^when you say dog i know you mean that bitch aka your wife FACT BWHAAAAAA
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 8:42 PM

rockinron
+2
last time i dutch ovened in bed my wife said and i qoute" my fuckin god Ron you should catch that fuckin thing and send it too crazy shit, maybe adam would eat it!" no lie i swear its true!!
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 9:53 PM

rodgtard
-1
bigtalk = pg LOSER!
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 10:10 PM

mattyc
-2
^^^ and the silver medal goes to...
[reply]
posted on: 08-04-12 @ 11:39 PM

yomammasass
+3
I pity any poor dumb cunt that marries you, Henry. I already pity all the poor dumb livestock you’ve molested in the months since your puberty.
[reply]
posted on: 08-05-12 @ 12:13 AM

wisconsinjed
+1
Henry I hope you take all I say about you as jests. I actually think you’re a pretty cool dude and probably a trip to hangout with! Just sayin’.
[reply]
posted on: 08-05-12 @ 12:26 AM

mrratty
0
@Rodgtard, I thought I was the only pg LOSER here. Dammit, I fuckin fail again. You BASTARDS!!!
[reply]
posted on: 08-05-12 @ 2:14 AM

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