Mother Fuckers Having Babies!

on 08.10.2013

So, my ladies friends are all having kids and shit. I already have a pair of hellions of my own, so, I sure as fuck don't want any more. When I'm 44 they'll be of age to do what ever they want, go to school, get a trade or join the Marine Corps. That's the only choice they have as far as the military is concerned. Any other choice will get them disowned, permanently! Anyhow, thankfully my lady doesn't want any kids and makes awesome sammichs. The only reason I haven't gotten a vasectomy yet is just in case I have to repopulate the earth after the impending apocalypse or zombie invasion or whatever other stupid shit people believe in. Plus, no need to go cutting stuff that don't need cutting as long as women keep taking their birth-control. Right? Love always --Henry M.

Henry M., henrym@crazyshit.com
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Comments From the Peanut Gallery
Assfuck women for peace on earth!!!
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 12:19 PM

Navy has the best food, Air Force has the best living quarters, Army and Marines do the shit work. Send them to school for Gods sake.
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 12:40 PM

I cant wait until their old enough for me tk introduce them to black metal and make them hate u!!! Fucking Henry.
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 2:00 PM

Let her forget to take that magical pill for a day or so and let us know how getting snipped isn't that necessary.
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 2:33 PM

If i had a choice of a world populated by the contents of Henry’s nut sac and a zombie apocalypse, i’d choose the zombie apocalypse.
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 4:56 PM

^^^you may have a point, on the other hand if Herny’s kids turn out to be like him we would know that every day will be the same old same
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 6:46 PM

henry has 2 kids? let me guess their names. "post" and "repost" you see "post" was born first then......
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 7:10 PM

^^^if he has anymore 2 kids will be answering to the same name
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 7:34 PM

I’ve always said that people need to pass I.Q. tests to have kids
posted on: 08-10-13 @ 8:26 PM

i’m the baby daddy of every single one
posted on: 08-11-13 @ 1:25 AM

i only fuck’em once, brah. those are the rules i set for myself. when you fuck’em only once, it’s like the night before your execution and you get your last meal; you know that this is it, and so you indulge as such. i treat them little babies like they’re the last girl on earth. they’re so spellbound, that by the time i commence to nut, they not only swallow, but wear a crooked smile in a feigned attempt at trying to convince me that they enjoyed the taste of it.Lol that shit cracks me up. bitches love me more than they hate the taste of semen. H-Dizzle till my soul sizzles!
posted on: 08-11-13 @ 4:53 AM

^^^ Man what the hell are you talking about?
posted on: 08-11-13 @ 11:34 AM