How Would You Know

on 11.04.2015

It turns out Chipotle may have given some people a little case of the E. coli, which got me to thinking. How would you know if you had E. coli from Chipotle, or just a normal case of the shits after eating a burrito from there? I guess if your shits last longer than a day, with the added benefit of throwing up. Really, if you had Chipotle, then went out drinking, you would have no fucking clue if you had a hangover, or just E. coli. --Jay D.

Jay D., jay@crazyshit.com
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Comments From the Peanut Gallery
If you have had diarrhea for a length of time and you go to see you physician, they will take a stool sample and send it off for test cultures. If the cultures come back positive for E. coli, your physician will what foods you lately eaten to narrow down the suspect food Jay. Sincerely, Robert Hallock the truckingman.
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 6:34 PM

I have a bad case of CRS ( Can't Remember Shit ) . My wife complains about ever day and I can't remember the last time she complained about or her name . I don't know what her fucking problem is .
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 6:41 PM

I have had that also happen to me Corruptedsob. My medicine is the cause of my memory problem.
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 6:45 PM

**** the more you know============
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 7:11 PM

A dining experience that'll help you lose weight.
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 7:33 PM

I never got food poisoning or any of that food disease stuff. Come to think of it i never broken a bone ither. Dislocated a few. WOW. this is some good fuckin bud.
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 8:32 PM

I know a dude that got drunk and ate some pussy that had the clap it ate holes thru his jaws and blinded him in one eye fucking bad both pussy and jaws now as for me one night I got drunk and ate this girl out goddam she was wet I thought I was the great pussy eater really thought I would get a major award from all women for making this girl so wet I was sucking that pussy crawling right up in that shit I was fucking drowning finally after all was done I retired back to the living room drenched in sweat pussy juice and to twist up my much deserved doobie and share the high with my friends and to also turn them on to that sweet wet pussy in my bedroom this is where it got SHITY and I wished I had that clap my other buddy had the fuckers informed me that I wasn’t the great pussy eater I thought I was and that I was the caboose on a very long train that she had pulled with my buddys now I didn’t get sick mind you but for about a month I didn’t need salt on my french fries another moral to the story don’t pass out at a party and wake up useing your wake up STIFFY on the first bitch you see at a party and make sure she’s dry before you dive so you no that’s your work down there not ten of your best friends the end.
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 9:27 PM

You’ll know if you have ecoli. You will shit, and you will cramp up like you’re giving birth, and the next day you’ll shit blood like you’re dying. You’ll go to the hospital because you think you are dying. And not to worry, if you do have ecoli, you won’t be the only one. And, now there’s that new strain of ecoli called STEC. Meaning it produces the Shiga toxin. You get it, you may wish you had AIDS.Anyway, you may die sooner than if you had AIDS. No, everyone go order a medium rare hamburger.
posted on: 11-04-15 @ 10:22 PM

Nobody wants to die from eating a hamburger so remember don’t let it warm up unless you are getting ready to cook it and make sure it is cooked all the way through (no red meat anywhere). Don’t forget to wash your utensils and hands that came in contact with the raw meat with plenty of soap and water. Make sure your counter top is cleaned very well after handling the raw meat. Do not touch "anything" with your hands after touching the raw meat. Use the back of your hand or use a paper towel when turning on the faucet. Don’t forget to clean off the soap dispenser. I always try to make sure the tool I am using to flip the burgers on the outdoor grill is exposed to as much fire as possible to help kill the bacteria. Please don’t kill your family or friends over a hamburger.
posted on: 11-05-15 @ 7:46 AM

Oh don’t be stupid and use the same plate that you put the burgers on the grill with and use it to remove them. I know 99% of people don’t but you always have people that don’t use their brains.
posted on: 11-05-15 @ 8:02 AM

When I was nine I got E Coli poisoning, I noticed because I bled through my pores. I woke up with tiny red dots all over and they smeared when you touched them. In the late 1960’s no one knew what it was.
posted on: 11-05-15 @ 9:41 AM