Date: Tue, 6 Jul 2004 23:33:59 -0700 (PDT)
From: Scott Scheinhaus -- firstname.lastname@example.org
In response to your article:
Why would you own a Cadillac anyway? Cadillacs are for two people. Niggers or old Jews. The old Jews buy them first and keep them for a few years. The niggers buy them later. You're too young to drive a car like that. Instead of some piece of shit nigger-mobile, why the fuck don't you drive something like a '94 Vette with a nicely powered LT1 engine instead? Hell, if you had a 6 speed, at least it would get about 27-28 MPG.
God damn! I hate Cadillacs. Or if you're religious, I'll rephrase that statement so it's not taking the Lord's name in vein... "Allah damn! I hate Cadillacs". Since I don't give a flying fuck about Allah, we'll use his name in vein all day long.
The next post I read about your car better be how you were trading it in at the Chevy dealer for a Corvette, or at the very least a Pontiac Trans Am or Camaro Z28. If you're going to drive a shitty American car, then at least drive something with a nice LT1 or LS1 engine that has the ability to roast the living shit out of the tires. If you're so hip on the nigger-luxury cars, then do nothing less than an Impala SS with the LT1 engine. 150 MPH from the showroom floor and will blow that STS out of its own way. The STS was a huge mistake by GM.
Smoke crack, Apple Jack.
Scott AKA Porch Monk
Tue, 13 Jul 2004 19:29:21 -0400
Scott Scheinhaus -- email@example.com
Subject: Re: STS
Scott, thanks for the concern on my Cadillac situation. But I gotta say, I will be buying another Cadillac soon. I am actually going for the DTS, all black with limo black tint. I really couldn't see myself owning a Corvette, well at least not a new one. Maybe one of those 60's stingrays would be nice. But when I see a guy driving a Corvette or Porsche that means one thing and one thing only: Small Dick. Those guys are really trying to over compensate for their lack of dick. Maybe that's why me and the "brothers" ride in Caddies. See it's got plenty of room to get comfy. My dick likes it. I like it. And all the women I have had in my Cadillacs always loved the back seat.
I've been driving Cadillacs since I was 16, I am now 27 and don't see me stopping. Sure, I wouldn't mind getting a new Suburban, but hell I can have the best of both worlds. I can get an Escalade. Ohh, and so you don't think that I am a Cadillac snob, I also own a 1991 Chevy 2500 pick up. That bitch will tow your house out of the fucking ground sideways. So I am a well rounded person.
As for speed. Here's some quick stats because I don't have all day to fucking write you back. Seville STS Horsepower: 300 Torque: 290 lb-ft. Chevrolet Corvette Horsepower: 300 Torque: 340 lb-ft. For a luxury car that's not to bad, huh Sparky? Anywho, thanks for being a small dick ignorant fuck and loving crazyshit.com. C-ya on the streets.