Sleepy Time

on 02.16.2005

Before I tell my story about what I went through last night, I have to tell you about our party last Friday night. We had our 6 year anniversary party on the top floor of the Paradise bar. We had a former playboy playmate for a bartender, tons of free drinks, free pool and our very own D.J. I think we might have gone through about 5 bottles of Jager, lord only knows how many bottles of liquor and a keg of beer. It was only me and Mikey drinking on the keg, so don't give me no shit. Jesse was ripped out of his gourd. Not only was he drunk by midnight, he also hit a curd and fucked up his car on the way home. We still don't know how he slipped away from the party at about 5 am and drove home. He's just mysterious like that I guess. I figured that I drank about a half bottle of one of the big Jager bottles. Ahh it was such a good party. If you'd like to see some of the pics from the party, you can click here.

Now on to my sleepy time story.

A few weeks back I went to the doctor to see what I could do about being tired all the time. He recommended that I go to a sleep clinic (or what ever the hell they call it). So I made the appointment, and last night was my night to be hard wired for sleep. I have to say the experience wasn't that bad. I have had worse, but holy fuck I had more wires on me than the bionic man. I had shit all over my head, neck, chest and legs. I had two big ass contraptions under my nose too. It's a wonder they thing people can even sleep.

We started wiring me up at around 9:30pm, and at about 10:20pm we were all finished. All I needed now as a good lightening storm to take my ass out with a quickness. I mean computers would be jealous with all this hardware on me. Anyways, back to the story, So, at about 10 ish, I finally fell asleep. That lasted about an hour and half. At about 12:30am, I now have to piss. So I have to call the nurse, which was a dude, in to give a brotha a hand. We get the wires all bundled up and I can leave my bed to take a leak. But all these wires are all infront of me, which makes it hard as hell to piss. How in the hell did they think I am supposed to piss? Well after I got finished sticking my dick trough wires, it's time to wire me back in.

I slept till 5am, and really was finally getting some good sleep on when I was woken up to go. After ripping off tape, some loss of body hair and sensors, I was free to go. I drove home and hit the sack for real. Now I have to wait 48 hours to see what the results will be. I'm off to have a nap.


Jay D., jay@crazyshit.com
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