Gots Me Some New Things

on 03.28.2006

Ok, one is a new thing, the other is a little ball of hair straight from hell. And if you don't know what that is, I got a new puppy. Oh and he's a true hellion. The other toy I got is a gun. But the good news is I have had the puppy for a week before I got the gun, so now I like him to much to shoot him. Even though, after cleaning up pee it is very tempting.

More about the puppy. His name is Petey, named after the dog from the Little Rascals, since he has dark patches around his eyes. Petey is a fucking freak, that's all there is too it. He's only a couple months old and he's already humping Drew's leg. Drew is one of my female dogs.

Since I already have two dogs, why did I get another one, you might ask? Well, I needed another dog, like I needed a hole in my head. My neighbors called me up and told me to come over and take a look at something. I go over there and he's like, "Jay, what you think about this dog?" I was like, "He's a good looking little guy, seems cool" My neighbor says, "Why don't you put him in your back yard, to play with your dogs" I put the dog back there. That had to be about 3:30pm or so. Well about midnight, I was getting the feeling that they might not be coming back to get the dog. Man, I don't want another dog!

After asking like 20 people if they wanted the dog, two friends said they'd take him. But then each one came up with an excuse on why they couldn't get him. Figures, so now I am stuck with Petey The Pisser. Sure he's cute, and he snores but I don't want dog wang all over my house. I have two girls, no boy dogs. I don't want dog wiener on my couch and shit. That's just plain ole nasty. But, what can I do, I guess he stays.

As for the gun I picked up a Glock .40. Having a .22 and owned some shotguns before the law took them away, I gotta say, I feel comfortable around guns. And for shooting a handgun that caliber, I am a fucking good shot too! I have included a few pics one of Petey and one of Mr. Glock, see if you can tell them apart.

Here's Petey and Drewie, she fucking hates him!

Say Hi! Mr. Glock!!! And yes, if you are asking, those are hollow points.

A little side note about the hollow points. Those fuckers are about a buck a piece. At that rate, if I shoot someone, I am going to be going through their wallets to get my money back. Fuck, itís not like I am trying to rob them, just think of it as we are exchanging precious metals for paper money. All except that the guy would have the metals in his ass, and Iíd have the money in my pocket. Fuck, if I had to shoot someone three times, I and all he had was a fiver, Iíd make the change for him. See, ainít I just a great guy?

Jay D., jay@crazyshit.com
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