We Got Some New Toys In The Office

on 04.26.2007

Ohh man, we got some new toys here at Command Central. Ohh baby, we's got some pocket bikes to ride around our office complex. They are 49cc's of pure action, standing like a foot and a half tall, these bad boys pack in fun, danger and no-self respect all in one little package.

I'm sure we really don't need them, but what the hell, we get bored, we race around this bitch. To be honest, I'm not sure how we haven't had the cops called on us yet. Because these fuckers sound like chainsaws at full rev. Every 30 seconds or so, we will fly by some poor shmuck's office window. I'm sure it must be something like this: Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmm. "What the fuck was that?" Brrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm "Ohh those morons in that one weird office have pocket bikes" Brmmmmmmmmmmmmmm "Fucking morons, I hope they crack their heads open."

After we put them together, I wasn't really sure how in the hell we were going to ride them. I'm 5'8 and I can barely get my feet on the pegs. Even with my feet on the pegs, my toes are basically still on the ground. Which means, wearing sandals riding these things is just about stupid. Which leads me to my next point. We are a bunch of stupid idiots. Not a single one of us wears shoes while we're riding these things. I went to take a sharp corner, and did the "drag my foot across the ground" to make my big toe look like ground up hamburger patty. Nice.

On to bigger and better plans. Now that we've tasted the sweet nectar of racing the pocket bikes, it's tricks time. First trick is going to be cat walking for sure. That's the basics for all motorcycle tricks. Then on to some seat standing shits, maybe even one foot on the seat and one on the handle bars. Which is always followed by jumping stuff. Ohh baby, we are going to jump some shit! My only concern is that will the bikes be able to handle the impact of a 200 pound man, at 30 mph on a 2 foot ramp? Probably not. That just means we might get one to two jumps in total before we'd need new bikes. But that is the risk I am willing to take, and of course this will be all video taped for your amusement.

I also included some pictures of us on the bad ass bikes. With the specialty racing stickers from crazyshit.com too.

Brmmmmm Brmmmmm!

Pure Racing Stickersssssssssssssssssss!!!

Me and Greg getting ready to rock this bitch

The only way to drive is with a beer.

Jay D., jay@crazyshit.com
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