Maria just got married, and being a traditional Catholic Italian, she was still a virgin. So,on her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was quite understandably nervous. However, her mother reassured hers. " Don't worry Maris. Tony's a good man. I cook pasta. You go upstairs, Tony will take good care of you." So up she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest.Maria ran downstairs to her mother and said, "Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest!"" Don't worry Maria, all good men have hairy chests. I cook pasta. You go upstairs and Tony will take good care of you." So up she went again. When she got in the bedroom, Tony took off his pants exposing his hairy legs. Again Maria ran donwstairs and said "Mama Tony's got big hairy legs!" "Don't worry Maria. All good men have hairy legs. I cook pasta. You go back upstairs and Tony will take good care of you." So, up our poor Maria went again. When she got up there, Tony took off his socks, and his left foot was missing three toes. When Maria saw this she went running downstairs once again. "Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half!" "Step aside." said her mother. "You stay here and stir the pasta, I'm going upstairs. This is a job for Mama!"