Heavenly Ass Kicking

on June 26th, 2006

Al-Zarqawi reaches Heaven.

There he is greeted by George Washington, who proceeded to slap him across the face and yell at him, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!"

Patrick Henry approached and punched Al-Zarqawi in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed."

James Madison entered, kicked Al-Zarqawi in the balls and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"

Thomas Jefferson came in and proceeded to beat Al-Zarqawi many times with a long cane and said, "It was evil men like you that provided me the inspiration to pen the Declaration of Independence!".

These beatings and thrashings continued as John Rudolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the Muslim terrorist leader.

As Al-Zarqawi lay bleeding and writhing in unbearable pain an Angel appeared. Al-Zarqawi wept in pain and said to the Angel, "This is not what you promised me."

The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in heaven. What did you think I said?

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