I keep one of these in my backyard at all times. It's way more fun to ride than a tire swing and a lot nicer to look at than a bird bath. She just requires a daily feeding and a spray down w....

Somebody needs to be introduced to a razor. Pubes that long may have been all good in the 70's, but now I think it's just plain inconsiderate to whoever is going down there. But that's proba....

Got eye troubles? Maybe your vision sucks or you just get bad migraines all the time. There's a real simple cure for it all. Just rub some testes in your eyeballs, and all your ocular proble....

I don't know what this dick could possibly be good for after he cut it up and whatever other fucked up shit he did to it, so he might as well nail it to a board. Hell, set that monstrosity o....

All aboard the slut train! Just get on all fours, stick your face in an ass and start crawling. Or jump to the head of the train and stick your dick in a mouth. Real or inflatable, it doesn'....

I bet he was just fucking an asshole and all the flies have landed to eat the shit out of his pisshole. There are better ways to clean up after anal sex, and ones that don't leave with bites....

Safe sex is making a comeback, but rubbers are so 20th century. The latex body suits are what's up now days. All you need is one, and you can cum in that piece a thousand times if need be. F....

I'll tell you one thing. This is the last time I let my neighbor borrow my tools. He said he had some projects to work on so I lent him my vice, and I get it back with all kinds of dick juic....

Those are some great tits, and the boots are hot too, but what's with the horse cock? I wonder who's getting that monster tonight. Does she make horse sounds while fucking with it? I guess t....

Gather around my precious fuck dolls, it's time to read a story. What the fuck is with these guys? He's got a bout $50,000 worth of Real Dolls, and he's reading fucking books to them. That m....

At first I thought, why the fuck would anyone do this? But then I realized something awesome. He could double penetrate a girl just with his balls. That would be simply amazing. I assume thi....

This fuck doll needs a good home and it just might be yours. If you're fucking inanimate objects, I don't think it can really be considered gay. You can chop her wang off if you like and jus....

I would be pretty impressed if he can get her bra off with that nub of his. Shit, I'd be impressed if she could use her nubs to put the bra on. All right, I'm intrigued. I want to see some h....

He definitely looks like the kind of guy who should be wearing a diaper. I bet he even shit himself already. Maybe he could get that hot chick behind him to change it for him. A couple hundr....

That is some Bieber shrine she's got going on here. And how many dildos does a girl need? I guess a lot if she's having visits from Justin. What's with the marshmallows? That chick needs to ....

The great thing about these masochistic whores is when you're done playing with them, or torturing and humiliating them, you can just hang them up and leave them be. Then when you feel like ....